A man dies and goes to heaven.  Of course, St. Peter meets him at the Pearly Gates.  St. Peter says, "Here's how it works.  You need 100 points to make it into heaven.  You tell me all the good things you've done, and I give you a certain number of points for each item, depending on how good it was.  When you reach 100 points, you get in."

"Okay," the man says, "I was married to the same woman for 50 years and never cheated on her, even in my heart."

"That's wonderful," says St. Peter, "that's worth three points!"

"Three points?" he says.  "Well, I attended church all my life and supported its ministry with my tithe and service."

"Terrific!" says St. Peter.  "That's certainly worth a point."

"One point?!!  I started a soup kitchen in my city and worked in a shelter for homeless veterans."

"Fantastic, that's good for two more points," he says.

"Two points!?!!"  Exasperated, the man cries, "At this rate, the only way I'll get into heaven is by the grace of God."

"Bingo - 100 points!  Come on in!"

We often try to fix problems with WD-40 and duct tape.....God did it with a nail.

- collected from the Internet

Due to the Church Family Picnic yesterday, this evenings Song-N-Supper has been moved to next Sunday evening.

There will be a VBS Meeting today at 4:00pm in the Small Auditorium.  This will be to announce the theme and start brainstorming for the projects.

Medina Children’s Home will host its annual Appreciation and Awards Banquet on May 6, 2006, at 12:00pm on the Medina Children’s Home Campus.  For information or reservation, please call 830-589-2871 or email dbarns@medinachildrenshom.com

Congratulations:
Kiley J. Mabry will be graduating from Harding University with a degree in Graphic Design.  He would like to invite his Woodlawn family to the graduation ceremony at 10 am on Saturday, May 13th at Harding University in Searcy, Arkansas.  Gary and Dixie ask for prayers for Kiley as he begins a new phase of his life.

STATISTICS FOR APRIL 23, 2006